Ask Sam letter


To Sam

Gay and came out

Hi Sam,

I'm 15 and I'm gay. I've come out to most people I know. Some kids at school make fun of me becasue I'm gay. They call me names and treat me differently. Quite often I get a shove and I'm told to get lost, and call me a fag. I feel really hurt when this happens, I feel lost and I don't know where I can go. I don't know what to do when I go back to school. What should I do?

Ask Sam


Hi there,

Thanks for writing to me and telling me about your experience of coming out as being gay and how you have been treated. As well as being called names and getting treated differently by kids at school, it also sounds as if this bullying that you experience is sometimes physical as they have pushed you around. That’s really not OK.

Your school has a duty to support you with any form of bullying you are experiencing and this includes homophobic bullying. I’m not sure if they already know what’s happening. If not, would you be able to talk to a teacher or someone you trust at school? You can find out more about your rights and the responsibility that your school has to keep you safe and challenge bullying on the Kidscape website.

You sound really worried about returning to school knowing that this bullying may continue. How would it feel to call or chat to a counsellor at ChildLine? They’re there to support you and talk to you about your feelings and how they’re affecting you. They could also help you to explore ways to keep yourself safe as well as work with you to think about who may be able to support you with what’s going on. 

The ChildLine message boards have a section about sexuality and you might find it helpful to talk with other young people about their experiences and share your own.

You can talk to a ChildLine counsellor by calling 0800 1111 or by logging on for a 1-2-1 chat. Counsellors will not judge you, just listen and support you.

Coming out is a big step for anyone so you've done really well.

Take care,


Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

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