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Hi there,
Im glad you thought of writing to me. You sound like a person who values relationships and friendships. I know its very normal for young people to think about their sexuality as they move from the teen years into adulthood.
You seem to be saying youd have to go outside your community to meet a bisexual or lesbian girl and youd like ideas for how to go about that. You mention that the area you live is small with old fashioned values but it could be important not to assume everyone has the same sexuality. In many communities its likely that there are people with different sexual orientations.
I understand you might really want to see what a relationship with a girl would be like, but often finding the right person can take time. Theres no set formula. The more people you meet, the more likely you are to find someone you are compatible with. You could do this by joining clubs, starting new hobbies or volunteering somewhere. Anything that lets you meet new people around your age would be a good start.
It sounds like if you start a relationship with another girl you want it to be a full, compatible relationship, rather than just a sexual encounter. The most important thing is to meet someone in a natural and safe way. One thought is that in some parts of the country, there are LGBT youth groups, and you could research whether theres one in your area.
We have some more information about understanding your sexuality but you could also check out the Young Stonewall website which has loads of information which may help you as well. It may also help you to take a look at our sexuality message boards.
I hope youll think about talking to us more about this so we can explore whats on your mind more and give you as much support as youd like.
Take care,
Sam
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.