Ask Sam letter


To Sam

Scared of my nan dying

Hi sam! im just scared of my nan dying! im 11 and she is 65 and il be 16 when shes 70 and im scared she will die then because thats when most nans die and i wont be ready
Ask Sam


Hi there,

It can be hard to think about losing someone we love and it’s natural to feel scared about them dying. Death is one part of life and although it’s hard to think about, coming to terms with it can mean we enjoy the time we do have all the more.

Everyone deals with death differently and there’s no right or wrong way to think about it. We can spend a lot of time thinking about what it’s going to be like when someone dies, while forgetting that they are still with us now.

Just because someone is old it doesn’t mean that they are going to die soon as people live to all different ages. In the same way, unfortunately someone being young doesn’t mean they will live to an old age. Nobody knows what the future holds and this is a fact that can be hard to face.

If you try and focus on the here and now – you may have a lot longer than you think with her, but still make as much use of that time as you can - you can create memories with your nan that last long after she’s gone. Find things to do with her, talk with her and find out her stories. You can’t go back and do that once she’s gone, whenever that may be.

You might want to talk to a ChildLine counsellor about how you feel. They are there to listen to you and support you.

I hope that helps.

Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

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