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To Sam

Next time im running away and living on the street

i think my mum is drinking and has these random bursts of anger. My dad left when i was about 9 (im 12 now) and ever since my mum has been horrible and abusive, she says horrid things behinds his back to me to annoy me! im always fighting with my mum but recently its calmed down, and she mainly starts argueing when i get to go on holiday with my dad because i do still see him, i think she is jelous of me and him!

ive told the school and they tryed to help but failed, also my dad trys to help but can't communicate with her because she hates him so much. i ran away once when she hit me and threw me on the floor, and then because she called the police they blamed me for wasting police time!

i hate it, but as i said she has recently calmed down but thats what keeps happening, as soon as im not seeing my dad much she is happy and then if i spend time with him she fusses and gets angry at everything...please help me sam! because next time she gets angry im going to run away and never come back!

Ask Sam


Hi and thanks for your letter,

You told me about your relationship with your mum and how it’s been really bad since your dad left when you were 9 years old.

It sounds like things have been really difficult for you over the last few years and mum has been treating you badly, especially when you’ve been seeing your dad. It’s important to say that what mum is doing is wrong, because you have every right to feel safe and looked after at home.

It must be very upsetting when mum is drinking and when she talks about dad behind his back. Mum and dad’s relationship should be kept between themselves and mum shouldn’t be taking her anger out on you.

You said you’ve told the school, who tried to help but somehow it didn’t work out, and I wonder if they know all the information that you’ve told me about what things are like at home? School have a responsibility to help keep you safe. I wonder if you could talk to someone else at school instead?

If not, I’m wondering if there is anyone else you trust that you could talk to about this? Like another relative or adult that you can trust?

Remember, if you feel you are in danger at any time you can call emergency services on 999 to get help quickly. I can hear that you had a bad experience with the police before, when you ran away – the police are there to protect you and it sounds like you didn’t feel that happened. Maybe that is something you could talk through with a counsellor at ChildLine.

You said you feel you will run away again next time mum gets angry – I would be very worried about you doing that, because running away is really not a safe option. You might find it useful to read the page about homelessness and running away in the Explore part of the website. If you do ever feel like you are going to run away, it would be great if you could speak to a ChildLine counsellor first, so they can help you think of some safer options.

Childline counsellors will always be there for you if you’d like to talk and you can call: 0800 1111 anytime or maybe use the online chat, by setting up an account with us. We also have message boards on our website where other young people write about lots of different topics, including the sorts of things you have experienced.

Take care,

Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

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