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Hi there,
Thanks for writing into me.
I can hear that things are difficult for you and your family and it's understandable that you will be going through a variety emotions, feeling lost and as time goes on that feeling that something awful is going to happen. It can be really hard to deal with these feelings, particularly when it's over a long period of time, it is important for you to know that you do not have to deal with this alone.
When a parent is ill it can be difficult to know how to cope and to know what to do next, it is ok to need some support with this, as at times it can be hard to cope alone. Some people may feel that they do not want to put pressure on a sick parent but many parents who are ill still want to be involved in their childrens lives - they really want to hear how their children are feeling and it's important you can have this conversation. Although things are difficult and changing, it can be helpful to look at realistic ways of having a normal family life as well. In your message it doesnt say if you have spoken to anyone about how you are feeling, this could be someone in your family including dad - as you may all be going through similar feelings and emotions and you could support each other through this time.
Riprap is a great website for young people whose parents have cancer. It has lots of advice, information, and other young people sharing their experiences, you might find that their are people going through a similar experience to yours.
If you'd like to, you'd be very welcome to talk to a ChildLine counsellor. You can contact them either on a 1-2-1 chat, for free on 0800 1111 or you can send an email.
Take care,
Sam
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.