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To Sam

Getting older

I'm 13 and ever since I was 8 I have been afraid of getting older my mom shares this fear to but I don't like to talk about it with her. Anyways I'm afraid because I saw my family die because they are getting to old. My dad is 50 and he isn't healthy I'm afraid the more I get older the more my family falls apart. Even at Christmas my sister is 16 and she and my mom just fought about teenager stuff all christmas we don't have fun anymore and we don't have family time. I want to spend more time with my family. My sister never says she loves me. My mom says she is always busy. My dad is always on the phone. My family has fallen apart and the more i get older the more it gets worse. Holidays used to be more fun and more about family now it's not. How do I Charisse the time I have with my family before I get older and before my sister goes to college?
Ask Sam


Hi there,

It’s natural to worry about losing people we love as we all grow older. The truth is we don’t know when people will die, but we should focus on enjoying life whilst we’re together.

Family life can be hectic. Sometimes it can feel as though everyone has their own thing to do, with no time for the family. This is normal and our parents, siblings and relatives will always have their own things going on. However, it’s good to do things together as well.

You’re right that it’s important to cherish the time we have with our families. You said you don’t have family time. Perhaps it’s going to need someone to organise things for that to happen. Think about what your family might enjoy. If you can’t think of something everyone can do together, think about what each individual enjoys instead. Perhaps you and your sister can spend some time together doing one thing, and you and your dad can spend time doing something else.

It’s not your responsibility to make the family work. However, if you want to spend time with them you might need to take control of that yourself and ask them to do things with you. Sometimes people can get caught up in their own lives and need reminding about how important their relationships are.

I hope that helps,

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