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To Sam

Staying in school

Hi I'm a 13 year old girl and I'm in year 9 . In year 8 I bunked off a lesson and I got an official warning from my deputy head but if I do something like that again , I risk my place at my school and the punishment could be an external exclusion . I tried to promise myself I wouldn't walk out of school this year but I am already finding it hard ! And I'm only in the first week . Please give advise

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Sam

It can be really difficult to do things that we feel are too hard for us. It’s important to find ways to get through the tough times and carry on. Sometimes small changes can make a big difference.

School is somewhere where you spend a large part of your life and it’s important that you feel happy there. Sometimes there can be a lot of pressure to do things that at times can be overwhelming. Not everyone looks forward to going back to school or even being there.

It can also be a lot of pressure when you feel that the promises that you have made to yourself and others are not something you feel you can keep. And that idea of punishment can make some people really quite anxious and stressed.

It may be an idea to think about the things that are causing you not to want to be in school. There are many things such as bullying, not being able to keep up with the school work, not having many friends and exam stress. All of these things and more may cause feelings of not being happy.

Finding ways to stay focused can be hard when things aren’t going well. But there are things you can do to help. For example, you could try breaking the day down into hours to stop it from feeling like it is too much for you to cope with. Take one hour at a time – try to get to the next hour, then the next and the one after that and so on.

It is also important to find time to relax and to have fun at the weekends. You may find that having something to look forward to at the weekends may help it easier to get through the week and helps motivate you to get through the week at school.

Rewarding yourself for the achievement of staying in school each week is something that you may find helpful. For example, you could write about how pleased you are that you managed to stick to the promises you made to yourself each week. Whenever you’re lacking motivation you can read through what you’ve written. You never know one letter a week could turn into a whole pile of letters with all the achievements that you’ve made.

Take care and remember Childline is here for you whenever you feel you need support.

Sam

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