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To Sam

Separated from friends at school

i am ij year 9 right now and next year we will be split into classes which we chose for our options i did not choose the same as my friends so i am scared of feeling really left out i am already split in a few classes and i have no friends in them i usually become isolated to myself and i get panic attacks because of this i try to make friends but i feel as i dont fit in can you give any advice?

Ask Sam


Hi there,

Being away from your friends at school can leave you feeling alone and isolated. When you’re cut off from your friendship group you might feel like you have no confidence and it can be hard to fit in and make new friends. Building your confidence and self–esteem can help when there are changes and new challenges in your life.

Making new friends isn’t always easy and it can take time. Sometimes that might mean stepping out of what you find comfortable and doing something different, like joining an after school club or looking out for people who share similar interests. The subjects you’ve chosen could be a useful way to start a conversation with someone in your new class, especially if it’s something that you really enjoy. We’ve also got some top tips for making friends which might give you some ideas.

Remember, it’s okay if you freeze up when trying to get to know someone. Take a few deep breaths to help you feel calmer and you can always try again another time. Your body language can have a big effect on the way that others see you and how you see yourself so try smiling even if you feel nervous.

It’s normal to feel anxious sometimes but when fears build up it can turn into a panic attack. It can be scary but try to remember that panic is your body’s response to stress and there’re ways you can try to control panic attacks. It’s important to find what works for you and keep practising so that you can start managing your anxiety too.

It might not happen all at once but there are steps you can take to bring out the best of you. You can contact Childline counsellors to talk to someone and get support whenever you need help.

Thank you for your letter.

Take care,


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