Ask Sam letter

Asker

To Sam

Friends

my friends are starting to ignore me, and act like im not even there. They talk more when im not with them too, its like they were just pretending to be my friend or they moved on. i would like help
Ask Sam

Sam

Hi there,

It’s important for friends to support each other. I’m concerned to hear about the way your friends are acting. Ignoring people or pretending they’re not there is a form of bullying. It’s not okay for people to exclude you and make you feel bad about yourself.

If you’d like to carry on being friends with them, it’s important for them to understand that they can’t treat you in this way. You deserve respect.

Perhaps you could let them know how their behaviour is making you feel. You could choose a time to talk to them individually to ask them to stop. If it’s got to a stage where you don’t feel able to talk to them openly, it could be a good idea to ask an adult for support in talking to them.

If you decide that they’ve moved on and you don’t feel able to trust them anymore, now could be a good time to think about the sorts of things you look for in a friend. It can be important to boost your self-esteem as you have lots to offer. Think about the sorts of things you enjoy and the types of things you’d like to share with friends.

Please remember that if you need to talk to someone, ChildLine counsellors are always there to listen.

I’m glad that you felt able to get in touch.

Take care,
Sam

Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

Ask me a question

You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.

Write me a letter