Ask Sam letter


To Sam

Being joked at because i let people but it hurts???

 I've been at this school for 3 years. I built strong relationships with people but i am known for being the silly, golibal, kind of girl. I never get mad at people but if i do people don't talk to me or ask me if something wrong with family problems (i have family problems) but since i am known for being open and silly they like to use me as their person to joke on. They take my pencil case grab my homeworks (wrinkles it, i have a OCD off of that) they take my things without me looking and it just never stops. I don't know how to fix this. I want it to end but people talk to me. My school is small, less than 280 people. So i can't hang out woth new people because i have a class that i stay with the whole day which is only 18 people. How do i stop this but still keep my friendships that i have right now but be a new person???
Ask Sam



Thank you for writing to me about how you are feeling. From what you've said it sounds like you’re going through a tough time at the moment with your friends at school.

I can hear that you feel frustrated with the way your friends treat you and that they say and do things which upset you. This is a form of bullying and is wrong. Perhaps you could take a look at our bullying page and read more about how bullying can affect people.

I can understand how difficult it is for you to know what to do because the same people who you trust to be your friends are the ones causing the problem. One idea could be to think about who you feel closest to and start by talking to that person by themselves. Once you have their support it might be easier to talk to the others.

You also said you want to keep your friendships but change yourself. It sounds like your friends have affected your self-confidence. Sometimes we try and be the person we think other people want us to be, rather than our real selves – especially when it comes to fitting in with our friends.

I would suggest taking some time alone and writing down the things that make you the person you are. Make sure to include good things about yourself as well, but if there’s anything you don’t like then write what you’d like to change and why you think it needs to change. It’d be good to ask yourself if you want it to change for you or for other people.

I can hear your friendships are very important so you may find looking at our page on friendships could be useful. If you would like talk more we’d be happy to hear from you - a ChildLine counsellor is here to listen either through 1-2-1 chat, email or by calling 0800 1111.

Take care

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