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To Sam

all alone

So im in all girls school (a school with only girls) and i have friends from my primary school but im falling out with them and just want to give up on them. I feel very lonley because i havent made any new friends and i dont like anyone else because no one else is nice to me, sometimes the students can be nice but not exactly friendly.
i want to go to a mixed school (girls and boys) because i feel i get along better with boys and i may move schools but its highly unlikey because my family is highly over protective and they dont want me getting a boyfriend or anything like that. But all i really want is some real friends i can actually have fun with, because at the moment im quite miserable and i only have 1 real friend left and shes never with me so i dont have anyone.

i told my mum about what my current friends are doing to me (making fun of my work, apearance and making faces) but she just says i have to go with them or ill be in trouble.

i really dont like the idea of this because of my old bestfriend who wants to do EVERYTHING with me. When im doing a project with someone else, she gets so jelouse and goes home crying and then my mum gets a phone call home and im in trouble.

i really want some realy friends to have fun with but i have no one, i dont like my current friends because they cause me stress and depresion, and i really dont want to go through that again.

Please give advice, it might be very helpful!

Ask Sam



It sounds like there have been big changes in your life recently. You say that you’re falling out with the friends that you have known since primary school, and that you’ve yet to make friends with anyone else at your new school. I can see how this would make you feel lonely. You’ve done well writing to me and expressing how you feel, and this is a step to you getting the support that you deserve.

Secondary school is a major step for most young people, and it’s natural for it to take time to adjust and for things to feel settled. You say that you want to move schools and go to a mixed school, but that your parents don’t approve and won’t let you do this. I can hear that it feels unfair, but it seems like at the moment you’ll have to try and make the best out of the school you’re at now.

As long as you are polite and respectful, you have the right to decide who you are friends with. It’s natural for friendships to change as we grow and develop into different people. I can hear that you don’t feel like the other students at school are very friendly. Perhaps if you spend time getting to know one or two of them a bit better, this might start to break the ice.

You said that your current friends are making fun of you and pulling faces. This sounds like bullying to me, and it’s not ok that they are doing this. Good friends should respect you and encourage you, not make you feel bad about yourself.

It seems like your mum was not very supportive when you tried to explain what things are like with your old friends. If they are bullying you and upsetting you, then you deserve to get support with making this stop. Perhaps you could speak to a teacher or someone like a school nurse about things. They should be there to support you and they would want you to feel happy in school.

You’ve mentioned having one real friend, but sadly you don’t get much time with each other. It may help to talk to your friend about how you’re feeling. Perhaps you can make plans together for the times when you are both available, maybe after school or at the weekends. If it’s hard to meet face to face, perhaps you could arrange to spend more time talking online, or over the phone.

You are welcome to come through to talk to a ChildLine counsellor by calling 0800 1111, or you can log in for a 1-2-1 chat (like instant messenger) or email.

Take care


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