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Hi there,
It can be really confusing when our feelings about our family situation change and we are then forced to do things or go places we do not like. I noticed that you said that you feel judged as well as other things. Im not sure whether its your dad you feel judged by but youve done well to talk to him about whats wrong. Youve explained things really clearly to me through writing, and I wonder if it could help to write to your dad as well to explain things again. Its really important that he respects your feelings and listens to what youre going through.
It seems as though something about seeing your dad for the weekend feels too difficult to cope with at the moment. It could help to think about what might make it easier to cope with. For instance, maybe you could take something with you to focus on like a favourite hobby or a picture that makes you feel better when you look at it. Perhaps you could make a list of things that make you feel better when things are difficult.
You mentioned a whole load of other things and Im not sure what they are, but if youre ever feeling alone and need to talk these things through, remember that theres always someone wholl listen. You could try talking to a friend, a trusted family member or someone at school. As well as this, ChildLine counsellors will also always be there for you to talk to. You dont have to try and cope with these difficult feelings on your own.
Thanks again for telling me how youre feeling. Im glad that you got in touch.
Take care,
Sam
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.