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To Sam

Troubles

My parents split up when I was 1, I am used to the fact tht they're not together, it's never been any different. But recently, I have felt constantly judged and a whole load of other things as well. I have told me dad what's wrong and now I still have to go this weekend. I was ok to go just for one day but I am not allowed. I hate it and feel really bad, my Mum has to place me in the car. I don't know what to do. Sorry if I bore you
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Sam

Hi there,

It can be really confusing when our feelings about our family situation change and we are then forced to do things or go places we do not like. I noticed that you said that you feel judged as well as other things. I’m not sure whether it’s your dad you feel judged by but you’ve done well to talk to him about what’s wrong. You’ve explained things really clearly to me through writing, and I wonder if it could help to write to your dad as well to explain things again. It’s really important that he respects your feelings and listens to what you’re going through.

It seems as though something about seeing your dad for the weekend feels too difficult to cope with at the moment. It could help to think about what might make it easier to cope with. For instance, maybe you could take something with you to focus on like a favourite hobby or a picture that makes you feel better when you look at it. Perhaps you could make a list of things that make you feel better when things are difficult. 

You mentioned “a whole load of other things” and I’m not sure what they are, but if you’re ever feeling alone and need to talk these things through, remember that there’s always someone who’ll listen. You could try talking to a friend, a trusted family member or someone at school. As well as this, ChildLine counsellors will also always be there for you to talk to. You don’t have to try and cope with these difficult feelings on your own.

Thanks again for telling me how you’re feeling. I’m glad that you got in touch.

Take care,
Sam

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