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My Sister Left My Family For One Boy

My sister left my family for one boy she liked. She left in April and right now it's September. I am 12 yrs old so I have to look after my brothers who loved my sisters the most. Most of my family are always sad. The guy she left for is a white guy even though we are Muslim. I already have a lot on my shoulders because of bullying at my school. The teachers have not done ANYTHING even though it has been going on for months. What should I do ASAP xx

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Sam

​​Hi there,

When you lose someone for any reason it can leave you with a lot of emotions. You might feel shocked, angry or upset, and it can take a long time to accept what’s happened. It can help to talk things through with someone you trust, like a family member, close friend or teacher. You can also contact a Childline Counsellor.

Having to face different issues can feel overwhelming. A lot of change has happened for you in a short time, as well as having to cope with what’s happening at school. It’s important to make sure you’re looking after yourself.

When someone in the family makes a big life decision, like moving away, it can affect everyone around them.

I don’t know the circumstances around why your sister left, but as people become adults they will start to make decisions for themselves and it may not be what you, or your family, agree with.

Looking after younger siblings can take a lot of time away from other things you enjoy doing. Your parents or carers should be doing most of that work, but as a family you may have to help out from time to time.

If you feel that looking after your brothers is taking too much of your time, it’s important to talk about this. You need time to focus on schoolwork, as well as time for yourself to relax and do things you enjoy.

It’s good that you’ve spoken to your teachers about the bullying. Bullying is wrong and no one has the right to hurt you or make you feel bad.

Sometimes, telling teachers once isn’t enough and you may need to keep talking to the school until something changes. Your school should have an anti-bullying policy. If you can read this, it should tell you what they’re supposed to do when you report bullying. If they’re not sticking to this, you can ask them why.

Talking to someone you trust can help but there are also other things that you can do yourself, like building up your confidence and becoming more assertive. If you feel you need more support or advice, remember you can always contact a counsellor at Childline.

Take care,

Sam

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