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My parents

My mum and dad are arguing a lot lately. My mum gets angry quickly and upset. She sends my dad out of the room and shouts horrible names to him. My 4 other brothers are quite worried and I help look after them been as though I am the elder girl. I help around the house but my mum does not listen to me or notice me . She apologies to us for getting mad but goes and does it over again and again. Should I be worried ? What can I do?

Ask Sam


Hi there,

When parents, carers or other adults threaten, bully or hurt each other it’s called domestic violence. When children and young people see or hear domestic violence, it’s emotional abuse. It’s not okay for this to happen.

It sounds like both you and your four younger brothers are affected by the arguments between your mum and dad. It’s wrong for you and your brothers to feel worried and scared all the time. Although your mum says she is sorry this doesn’t help if it keeps on happening.

It also sounds as though you’re being given a lot of responsibility for looking after your brothers. This feels overwhelming for you at times. Being a young carer and helping around the house shouldn’t interfere with your school or college work or getting the care and attention that you need to be happy, healthy and safe.

If you’re struggling to cope then it’s important to get some help and talk about how you’re feeling, especially if your mum doesn’t listen to you. Talking to a trusted adult such as a teacher, social worker or counsellor could help, and if you ever feel that you or your brothers are in danger then call 999.

Remember, ChildLine is there for you whenever you need to talk.

Take care,

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