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To Sam

my mum will not let me live my life

my mum will not let me live my life and all i want is to be a teenager and have fun but she is stopping me from seeing my friends and boyfriend! its not fair and she is pushing me away all the time i really want to leave home because i cannot take anymore of her and she has started acting weird with her new partner and she goes out leaving me at home a lot! i cannot take this! is there any place i can go to get away from her where she cant say no? :'
Ask Sam


Hi there

Thanks for taking the time to write and share this with me. 

Things are sounding tough for you at the moment and I can tell that you are feeling restricted and would like more freedom to be with the people you usually have fun with.

I’m sensing that you’ve noticed a real change lately with you and your mum’s relationship and also a change in your mum’s behaviour. I’m also thinking that you’ve reached a point where you would value some support. ChildLine is here for you and if you would like to talk it all through, you could ring and speak to a counsellor free on 0800 1111 or have a 1-2-1 chat online. This would be useful because it’s difficult to say what your options are, without really knowing your age.

You do not say how old you are or how often your mum leaves you at home. It’s really important for you to be safe and happy and your mum has a responsibility to protect you. I’m not sure who you might have to support you at the moment or if there’s an adult you would trust to tell.

I also wonder if you would still want to get away from home if things could be different between you and your mum. This is a normal reaction when things at home are not good but it is also something that requires a lot of thought and discussion.

Some young people in situations like yours can get help from teachers or people outside their family because they find it easier to talk to them. Sometimes the people who are responsible for looking after us - parents or guardians, do not realise the impact their behaviour is having on us. It might be worth thinking about what your mum would do or say if she knew how you are feeling.

You can talk about this confidentially if you do decide to speak to a ChildLine counsellor. They can help you think about your situation and look at options including how you could try talking to your mum.

Thanks again for writing to me and take care,


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