Hi there,
Whether its in foster care or with your family, you deserve to feel respected and cared for. When you dont, its always okay to want to support.
Having arguments with your family can be really difficult, especially when youre expected to take sides. Loving your mum doesnt make it okay for your sister to hate you or to call you names.
Sometimes in families there are times that youre going to disagree no matter what. This can be over small things - like TV - but it can also be over big things, like your mum. Respecting how someone else feels doesnt mean pretending you feel the same way or ignoring what you think. You can both disagree about your mum and whats happening, but respect each other about what is happening.
Sometimes one of the best ways to stop arguing over a topic can be to spend time together without talking about it. Taking a break can help both of you to remind yourselves that youre sisters.
If you do decide to talk about your mum more, it can be good to think about ways of doing it assertively. Being assertive means saying what you want without being aggressive. It's about being confident. You cant always control how your sister might react, but you can be clear about what you think is best to do.
Youve got the right to have your voice heard in whatever is being decided about your care. This means that if youre unhappy in your foster family then its okay to say that. Your social worker is there to support you, and they can help you find ways to talk to your foster carer when you arent getting on.
If you ever feel like things have broken down with your care, you can talk to your social worker about that. You also have the right to an advocate.
An advocate is someone whos not part of social services, and whos there to make sure that your voice is being heard. You can find out more about advocates at Voice.
When youre thinking about your relationships, it can be good to think about the things that might be getting in the way. Alcohol can have a really negative effect on people, both when theyre drinking it themselves and when theyre around other people who drink it. Getting support can be really scary, but it can also help you to find new ways to cope and relate to the people in your life.
If youre ever not sure about your family or your care you can always talk to one of our counsellors. They're here to offer support about anything that might be happening.
Take care,
Sam
