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To Sam

About my mum

My mum drinks a lot of alcohol. And when she has quite a few glasses of wine at night her mood changes some days its a good mood but others she gets angry. A few months ago she had quite a lot of glasses of wine and was angry I went upstairs and spilt some juice by accident and she heard it downstairs and came upstairs and started shouting at me saying "I didn't just spill it I threw it on the floor in anger!" she grabbed my arm and neck and was screaming in my face saying I'm selfish and self centred! At the moment I don't like my mum and would love to live with my Dad but I can't because he's in the army. Also at the moment I keep thinking about when I was younger because when I was younger I watched my dad hit and punch my mum I was hard to watch i wish i could have defended her but i was too young and didn't know what to do  I don't no why I keep thinking about it though. My mum is now with a different man my step dad I've had to watch him hit my mum to this time I defended her and her pushed me up the stairs! I've had to ring the police on him 3 times now.

Thank you for reading

Ask Sam


Hi there, thanks for your message.

It sounds as though things at home are not OK at the moment because of the adults in your life.

For many adults alcohol doesn’t have any effect on their day to day life, but for some it can be a real problem. Although your mum may drink a lot of alcohol, it’s not an excuse to hurt you. It can be confusing and hurtful when someone who is in a good mood then becomes angry and then, for a time, we feel that we no longer like that person.

Nobody has the right to hurt you physically or emotionally and it can be especially difficult when the people that do are the same ones that are supposed to look after you. You’ve had to see some really tough things in your life – nobody should have to see a parent being hurt by their partner and nobody should have to try and defend their mum or dad in that way. It can take a lot of courage to call the police and even though people can hurt us sometimes, it can be hard for us when they get hurt.

It sounds as though there are things in the past you’re trying to cope with while things in the present are still not right. What would it be like to get some support for that? Did you know that if you spoke to a ChildLine counsellor about this, they could keep it just between you and them? They might also be able to help you change things – and that might help your mum too. You can ring free and confidentially on 0800 1111 or you can have a 1-2-1 chat through the website. You can also send us an email and we will send you an email in response. You will have to set up an account to do this, but it's really easy to do.

I’m really glad you sent me this message because I want you to know that you’re not alone and that ChildLine can be here to support you. ChildLine will be ready to listen when you are ready to talk.

Take care.


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