Ask Sam letter

Asker

To Sam

Was it sexual abuse if it was online and written/drawn?

hey,,, i was wonderin if it was sexual abuse even if it was online ??? when i was 9 someone sent me drawn porn without my consent and then forced me to write sexual things in return in the form of a roleplay through messaging, threatening to tell my family if i didnt and kept sending the messages,,, they made me write every single detail of it ????? does this still count as sexual abuse ??

Ask Sam

Sam

Hi there,

Sexual abuse means that someone has forced, tricked or pressured you to do something sexual that you did not want to do. Drawings, roleplays and stories can all be sexual and so can be used for abuse. What happened to you was not okay and nobody should do that to you whether it's online or in person.

Porn can come in lots of different forms and can be used to abuse someone sexually if it's shown to them when they did not want to see it. The law can treat drawn images just as strictly as real photographs - if someone were to draw pornography involving children for example. Whatever happens, nobody should force you to do or see anything you don't want.

When talking to someone online there are sometimes records kept about what was said, depending on what you used to talk to them. If someone is abusing you online, it's important to try and save as much evidence of it as you can. If you ever choose to tell someone about what happened, those records can be very useful in finding the person who was abusing you.

It's okay to talk to people about what happened if you want to. What happened isn't your fault and your abuser knows this. It's unlikely that the abuser would ever tell your family about what happened because they know that they would be in a lot of trouble if they were found out. If someone is making threats like that it can often be to make you feel like you've done something wrong, when you haven't.

It might help you to talk to someone you trust in a bit more detail about what happened, so that you can begin to work out what you'd like to do next. Our counsellors are always available for you to talk to and can usually keep what you say confidential.

I hope this helps, thanks for your letter.

Sam

Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

Ask me a question

You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small.

Write me a letter