Ask Sam letter


To Sam

Turning 16 first

I'm a girl and for a few months now, I have been having sex with a boy in my year. We aren't actually boyfriend and girlfriend but we have known eachother for years and I feel like he is someone I can trust and we are happy doing what we're doing.

We're both 15 but I turn 16 next month and he doesn't until nearly another 2 months after that so my question is once I've turned 16 could I get into legal trouble if we keep having sex even though it is such a small age gap between us (1 month 21 days) and it is all consensual and everything? and if so how serious is it?

Ask Sam


Hi there,

Any kind of sex should always be consensual. This means everyone involves agrees and is comfortable with what’s happening. It's great to hear that you trust this person you’re having a sexual relationship with.

When you decide to get intimate with someone, it's important to consider if this person makes you feel safe, and to make sure they aren’t pressuring you into doing it. This includes taking into account their age.

The legal age of consent in the UK is 16. This means that it’s against the law for anyone over the age of 16 to have any kind of sexual contact with someone under the age of 16.

It’s important to remember that this law is there to protect children and young people from being taken advantage of rather than punish people in a consenting relationship. Every case is different which means we can’t say what might happen if you were to have sex.

When you’re not sure it’s good to have an open conversation with your partner, it’s part of any healthy relationship even if you don’t consider yourselves boyfriend and girlfriend. You can also get confidential information from Brook.

It can be difficult talking about things you find personal, but Childline is here to support you no matter what’s happening. Every counsellor is here to support you through how you’re feeling and can help you to think about what you feel is best.

Take care,


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