I have had sex with a girl and am worried that she is pregnant. I love her but don't want a child. do I pressure her into having a abortion?
Hi there,
If you have unprotected sex, there’s always a chance that someone can get pregnant. It can be scary if you’re worried someone’s pregnant and you’re not sure what to do next. But there are options, and it’s always best for you to talk to a medical professional to find out more.
As a first step, it’s best to find out if your girlfriend is pregnant or not. This is something only she can do, and only if she wants to. She can get tested at her GP, a local sexual health clinic or by buying a test from a supermarket or chemist. But it wouldn't be okay to pressure her into taking any tests, or to do anything she doesn't want to do right now.
If a girl becomes pregnant, abortion is one option available. It's important to talk to your girlfriend about whether abortion is the right option. And the final decision does belong to the woman. It can feel really scary feeling like something is out of your control, but it's never okay to pressure someone into making that decision.
Whenever someone makes a decision, no matter how important or life changing, it should be because they have weighed up their options and they have made the choice they wish to make. If she did turn out to be pregnant, it is her decision what she does next.
If you are worried about what might happen if she is pregnant then you can talk to one of our counsellors and they'll be able to help you work out what your options and your choices are - as well as for your partner, if she wanted to talk. Brook has more information about getting a pregnancy test on their website.
I hope that helps, thanks for the letter.
Sam
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.
