Ask Sam letter

Hi and thanks for your question about pregnancy and having a baby.

Most people ask questions about where babies come from at some point when they are growing up - this can happen at any age. Pregnancy can be complicated to understand though and often knowing where babies come from doesn’t answer all of the questions you might have.

I can hear that you’re wondering what the reason is for your sister coming out of hospital sooner than your brother. This is a really difficult question for me to answer because there could be lots of reasons. What I can say though is that it’s not unusual for some babies to stay in hospital longer than others and that it would often be to make sure the baby is okay before it is taken home.

You’ve said that you keep thinking of having a baby yourself and are asking whether this is a normal thing to do. It’s very normal to think about babies when growing up. As your body changes and becomes older you might start to get feelings of wanting to be pregnant, even though you may be too young to actually have one.

Eventually everyone goes through something called puberty where their body does become ready to have children, but this is mostly a physical change. To be ready to have children also means being mentally, emotionally and financially ready to look after a baby too and that may not happen until you are an adult.

It sounds like you now have a younger brother and sister – I wonder what it’s going to be like for you being older than them and perhaps needing to take care of them sometimes? You could also see if there are other things you could practice caring for – maybe asking for a small pet or plant that you could be responsible for.

Thanks again for your message, it was really nice to hear from you. Take care and don’t forget that you can always talk to a counsellor here at ChildLine if you want to chat more.

Sam