Hello,
Thank you for your letter and telling me a bit about how you are feeling at the moment.
Youve told me your friend is really worrying you, as she has started to give random boys her number. I can hear how uncomfortable you feel about her doing this.
Its understandable that you would feel worried about the safety of your friend and it sounds like you want to be able to talk to her about this. You havent told me how she knows the boys she gives her number too. The way youve talked about it makes me think she might be meeting them online. If shes giving her phone number to people shes met online, that would worry me too. Its important to think carefully before agreeing to give anyone your phone number, because once theyve got it, it is easy for them to use it to hassle or upset you. Its really hard to know if someone you meet online is telling the truth about who they are and what they want, so I would advise never giving out your number over the internet.
Youve said you dont know what to say because that might break up your friendship. I can imagine its difficult feeling so unsure about what to do. It sounds hard for you to watch your friend putting herself at risk, but I can hear that youre worried about how she could respond if you did try talking to her.
What do you think it might be like to send her an email, or write her a note, explaining how worried you are about her safety? You could even come online and show her this letter and my answer? Or you might want to have a look at the CEOP website with her. It has some really useful tips on staying safe online. There is also page on the ChildLine website which has advice about helping a friend that you might find useful
You sou.nd like a caring friend, which is great, but its also important to think about how this is making you feel and how you are coping. It can be good to remember that you are not responsible for the choices your friend makes. Perhaps you can think about contacting a ChildLine counsellor directly to talk some more. You can do this by calling 0800 1111 (free from any phone), logging in for a 1-2-1 chat or sending an email from your locker. ChildLine can also be a safe space for your friend to ask for support if she wanted to.
Hope this letter has been helpful.
Take care,
Sam
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.
