Ask Sam letter


To Sam

My Crush

Hey sam, you see i have a crush on this boy at school (seriously i really really like him .)

but i dont know what to do because me and my friends usally just mess around with him and his friends. my friends dont really like him though.although me and my crush are pretty playful,we pretend to hate each other in like a jokey way ,but i feel like he might like me as well and i dont know what to do since my best friend doesnt really like him and i dont want to lose any of my relationships with them

i really want to keep my friends and my crush in a balanced postition but im really worried im gonna lose one of them..

please , please help

Ask Sam


Hi there,

Having feelings for someone can be an exciting experience, but liking someone your friends don’t get on with might leave you feeling stuck in the middle.

Friends might not like a crush for lots of reasons. They might not like that person or think your crush isn't right for you.

When your friends dislike your crush, it can be useful to ask why. They may have a good reason, or see things that you don’t. But at the same time, you might see good things about your crush that they don’t. Talking about it can help you all understand each other.

Disagreeing with your friends doesn’t mean you can’t be friends any more. Your friends should respect your feelings about this boy no matter what their opinions are. If a disagreement turns into an argument, you can get support from our friendship page.

When you like someone, working out whether they feel the same may feel difficult. But it can be even harder without speaking to them about it. I can see this boy is someone you already spend time with, but it could help to have a conversation about what you have in common to get to know each other better. This will help you to be clearer about your feelings and you may find out if he likes you too.

Worrying about how to talk to someone you like is normal. If you decide to ask him out and it doesn’t go well, you may feel embarrassed. But try to remember that you won’t feel like this forever and most people have had similar experiences.

If you'd like to talk about this, you can always speak to a Childline counsellor. You can also look at our Relationships message boards to get advice and support from other young people.

Take care,


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