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Asker

To Sam

Me and school situation

im 14 and have been at my secondary school for three years. I’ve chosen my gcse’so i am going into 4th year. In first year my few “friends” really turned against me and started to make bad things out if my photos using snapchat and photoshop-like apps. Last year they were comstantly telling me to kill myself and that im not loved. i‘d rather not go into how i felt snd what i nearly did. This year it also continued with my last best friend turning against me , but recently he has apologised and suddenly the others have turned back to liking me. I really dont know what to do because i used to be really good friends with them but then they badly bullied me. Im really torn between what i should do that’s right.

Thanks!

Ask Sam

Sam

Hi there

Bullying is wrong and can be hard to cope with, especially when the bullies used to be your friends. Being bullied on social media might make it difficult to escape from the bullying as it can affect you wherever you go but help is available

Being bullied can affect how you feel about yourself and your confidence so it’s important to take action to get the bullying to stop. You can report online bullying directly on the site you’re using and posts or comments that are threatening or abusive can be reported to the police. You can screen shot messages as evidence and then block or unfriend people who you don’t want to see your photos or posts anymore.

Remember that you haven’t done anything wrong and you don’t deserve to be bullied or treated badly. If being bullied is making you feel depressed or making you think that you might hurt yourself it’s important to talk to someone about how you’re feeling. Getting support can help you to recover from the negative effects of bullying and you can talk to a trusted adult, friend or a counsellor at Childline.

As you build your confidence and self-esteem you’ll start to feel better about yourself and realise that you can decide who you want as a friend and who you don’t. Think about what’s important to you in a friendship and look for those qualities in potential friends. Sometimes bullies might start to bully someone else, so noticing how someone treats other people can often help you decide if they’re someone you want as friends or not.

Friendships can be difficult and there might be times when you fall out and it can be hard to trust people who have hurt you in the past even when they’ve apologised and things seem to be different now. It can be confusing when someone changes how they behave with you so trust your gut about how comfortable you feel with them. It’s your decision how much you let them back into your life. If you still feel uncertain about them or scared of what they might do then it’s okay to keep your distance but still be polite.

Sometimes people apologise for their past behaviour when they realise that they did something wrong. They might genuinely want things to change and you can choose whether you want to be friends with them again or not. Whatever you decide to do it’s often a good idea to keep a wider circle of friends so that you’re not relying on a few people if things go badly again in the future.

Thank you for your letter

Take care

Sam

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