There is a guy in my sixth form & I don't know if I'm overreacting to his behaviour & feel silly admitting that it bothers me. Whenever I am around him he constantly looks at my boobs and it makes me really uncomfortable. I've asked him numerous times to stop and told him to stop but he just doesn't. The other day he pushed one of my female friends and bent her over a table! He constantly picks on me but we're in the same friendship group so it's difficult to avoid him. He always stares and makes my bestfriend uncomfortable too. But he doesn't pick on her as much as me. Am I overreacting? I feel so uncomfortable and really stupid to go the staff at my sixth form as I'm worried I'm over reacting and I'm quite embarrassed. Is this sexual harassment or am I just being silly? I feel so horrible because today I resulted to making a racist comment about him & that is so not me. I'm not racist, I think it's disgusting but I just wanted to insult him but as soon as I said I knew it was wrong. I'm disgusted & just want him to leave me alone.
Sam
Hi there,
Someone staring at you in a sexual way or touching you inappropriately is wrong. And this classed as sexual harassment. You have done the right thing talking to me about how this has been making you feel.
It was really mature and sensible to talk to this guy about how what hes doing is making you feel, although it sounds like he hasnt changed his behaviour. Its not okay for him to act this way around you and you dont have to put up with it.
Talking to teachers about something embarrassing is hard. And its common to feel like you are overreacting. But as this is something thats affecting you its not an overreaction. You havent done anything wrong and what this guy is doing at school shouldnt be happening.
Everyone has the right to feel safe and secure at school, and it doesnt sound like this is happening at the moment. You could talk to a member of staff, or another trusted adult about what has been happening. It may be an option to try to do this with your friend, so that you can support each other with this.
You mention you made a racist comment and this is something that goes against what you believe. It can be worth spending some time thinking about other ways to respond to this type of treatment. We can sometimes react in a way that does not define us and this makes us feel disappointed in ourselves.
You can talk this through some more if you need to with one of our counsellors, they will be happy to chat about this confidentially. Remember they're here to support you.
Take care, Sam
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