Ask Sam letter


To Sam

Im having a hard time...

Dear Sam,

im having a hard time at school with people who are watching sexual videos and getting me involved. i dont know what to do 

Ask Sam


Hi there,

At school there are lots of different things which become popular for a time. And if they’re things you don’t want to try or that you don’t agree with, it can be hard to cope.

It sounds like you're being pressured to join in or fit in and others. And this can make us feel different if we don’t do the same as everyone else. Sometimes people go along with what’s happening because they want to be accepted by or feel part of a group. But you should never do anything you don't feel comfortable with.

If it feels uncomfortable for you, you might be experiencing peer pressureBeing assertive and standing apart from the crowd can take a lot of courage, but it shows that you disagree with something that others appear to find acceptable.

It’s really important to try and let people know that you don’t want to join in with what they are doing. But if that feels difficult for you, you could try removing yourself from the situation by going somewhere else.

Real friends should respect and support you when you make a different choice. Perhaps talking to your friends for some support might help you to feel more able to choose differently from people around you.

The counsellors are always there for you to talk if you would like to talk more about peer pressure, or anything else that’s on your mind. It could also be a good idea to think about how you might want to keep yourself safe online when your friends are sending you things to watch.

Take care,

Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

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