Ask Sam letter


To Sam


Hi Sam,

I have a crush on a boy at school (and seriously Sam, I REALLY like him) but my friends don't really like him as much, not even in the friend way... How can I crush on him and balence my friends at the same time? I know he doesn't feel the same way about me , but I don't want to lose my friends to a relationship that is never going to happen anyway...

What do I do?! Thanks for the time though ;)

Ask Sam


Hi there,

Liking someone who your friends don’t get on with can leave you feeling stuck in the middle, but that doesn’t mean you have to be alone.
Your friends can dislike a crush for lots of different reasons. Sometimes it can be that they don’t like who he is, sometimes it can be that they don’t think the crush is right for you.

When your friends do dislike your crush, it can be good to ask why. They may have a good reason or see things about them that you don’t. And you might see things that they don’t. By talking about it you can make sure you all understand each other.

It’s important to remember that not agreeing with your friends doesn’t mean that you can’t be friends any more. If a disagreement turns into an argument, you can read more about what to do on our friendship page.

Sometimes when you’ve got a crush it can be hard to think about anything else. It can be even harder when they don’t feel the same way. It can help to do things that you used to enjoy before you had this crush.

Doing other things with your friends can help to take your mind off this person for a little while, it can also help stop any arguments with your friends.

If you’re ever feeling like you can’t talk about your crush and you really you want to, you can share your thoughts with other young people on our message boards. You can also talk to one of our counsellors any time.

Take care,

Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

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