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To Sam


Hi Sam,

Me and my boyfriend wants to be sexually active when we meet up and we had both agreed that i should go on the pill but i dont want my parents to find out that I am on the pill. How would I be able to get them and that also should we also use other methods of contraception when we want to have sex. I am 16 soon 17 if that helps.


Ask Sam


Hi there,

Thank you for your letter. Having sex for the first time is a really big decision to make, both physically and emotionally, and you’re right to talk about it. You’re making a really big choice by becoming sexually active. And it’s really mature of you and your boyfriend to talk about your options around contraception.

I can understand you wanting to keep this private between you and your boyfriend. It can be embarrassing talking about these things, particularly with parents. You’ve got the right to get support from sexual health services confidentially. So you could speak to a doctor about your options, or visit a sexual health clinic where they can also help you.

The pill is one form of contraception and is similar to the injection, the patch and the implant. All of these are effective at preventing pregnancy, but remember they don’t protect you from sexually transmitted infections (STIs) – only condoms can do that.

There are lots of places you can get contraceptives like the pill or condoms for free and without someone like your parents needing to know – even if you’re under 16. Brook has a list of contraceptives and where you can get them. And you might find helpful advice on The Site.

You can talk this through some more if you need to with one of our counsellors, they will be happy to chat about this confidentially.

Take care,

Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

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