Ask Sam letter

Hi there

Thanks for contacting me to get some advice about sex and contraception. Deciding to have sex for the first time is a really big thing and it’s important that you and your boyfriend make a decision that is right for you both. It’s really positive that you are thinking about contraception but when deciding to have sex for the first time there are some other things that you both should be thinking about.

It is perfectly natural to think about sex and having sex for the first time but it's important that you are well informed and safe. In the UK the legal age to have sex is 16. This law is designed to protect young people as 16 is the age when it is considered that young people are both physically and emotionally ready to have sex.  There are other really important things to consider such as contraception to protect from pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections.

I’m wondering if you and your boyfriend have considered or talked these things over. Perhaps you could have a think about what makes you both want to have sex now, and if you feel ready? Your boyfriend may feel ready because he is closer to 16 but it's ok if you don't feel ready yet. It might help to have a look at the Sex and relationships information in Explore as there's lots of information on sex, contraception and sexual health.

Also the Ready for sex? page of the Brook website might help both you and your boyfriend think these things over. They also have lots of information about different types of contraception including condoms.

Perhaps there is also a trusted adult in your life who might help you think this over? Whatever you decide, you can talk to a ChildLine counsellor by logging in for a 1-2-1 chat or by phoning 0800 1111. All your calls to ChildLine are confidential and you can read more about our Confidentiality promise.

Take care,

Sam