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breaking up because I'm in love with somebody else

Hi Sam,

I am planning to break up with my boyfriend who i have been with for 7 months because i like somebody else and I am not to sure how to do it without hurting him. I decided that i did not like him anymore a few days ago when I was talking to twins and i realised that i was having feeling towards them. (Lets call my boyfriend archie) Archie is an amazing guy who can get an beautiful girl but i find the twins more attractive so i need help on breaking up with him. After that the challenge is sicking a twin!

Thanks,

xx

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Sam

Hi there,

Breaking up with someone can be really hard sometimes. For some people it's because they don't want to hurt the other person's feelings, for others it's because they are taking a big step and it's scary. Whatever the reason it's okay to feel the way you feel and you're not doing anything wrong by breaking up with someone. If you've made your mind up to end the relationship then it's better to do it sooner rather than later.

We can't control how we feel or who we fall in love with. It's not anyone's fault that your feelings have changed . I can tell you don't want to hurt your boyfriend’s feelings, so it seems important to break up with him as soon as you're sure that's what you want to do.

The best way to break up is probably in person as it means you can have a conversation and say how you feel, face to face. When breaking up it's usually a good idea to make sure you spend time apart afterwards so you can both move on. If you're going to do this then it's best to say everything you want to say at this point, so you don't have to talk again later. It would be important to make sure he gets a chance to say everything he wants to say as well for the same reason.

There are other ways you can break up - by writing a letter, on the phone or by text but they can often not be as personal as doing it face to face. It's more difficult to do it in person but you might find it allows you both to move on quicker.

I hope this helps, thanks for the letter.

Sam

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