Ask Sam letter

Asker

To Sam

break up

Hi sam, i recently broke up with my boyfriend who ive got deeply in love with, i dont know what to do i feel so depressed:( i miss him like crazy as it just feels asif my whole world came crashing down at onces. i feel so empty i wanna die i know it sounds daft but its true help me:(
Ask Sam

Sam

Hi there

Thank you for having the courage to write to me and share your very special feelings for this boy. I can tell he still matters a great deal to you and the break-up has left you feeling broken-hearted.

Sometimes a break-up can be such a loss that it can feel like bereavement and I have a sense that it may feel this way for you. That feeling of emptiness is also understandable when you are going through such emotional pain and especially when you are used to having your boyfriend around. Different things work for different people at times like this and it could be that the more you spend time with friends or try to do some of the other things that you usually enjoy, the more that emptiness might start to be filled again. I know this may take some time and it can be hard to think this way when you feel so low. You say that it sounds ‘daft’. It is not daft to share with people how you are feeling particularly when we are feeling this way. I think you have been very brave in writing this letter and looking for help.

I’m concerned that you say you want to die and unsure whether this is something that you are seriously thinking about. Deep emotional pain can make us feel very desperate and alone and that we just want that pain to end. I want you to know that harming yourself is not the answer and there are other ways to get thought this. Your safety is so important and that’s why I’d like to ask if you would talk to a ChildLine counsellor free on 0800 1111, so that we could find out a bit more about how you are and so that you could talk some more about your difficult break-up if you like.

You might also find it useful to have a look at the topic of relationships in the Explore section of the ChildLine website or chat to other young people who might be in the same situation on the relationships message board.

Thanks again for being so brave.

Take care

Sam

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