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To Sam


Hi, my ex is blackmailing me if I don't send things to him. When we dated I sent him stuff but now that we don't I don't send him pictures anymore. He says if I don't send them, he will send my other ones to my sisters and to a boy in my school to send them around to everybody. I don't know what to do,,,,

Ask Sam


Hi there,

Blackmail is when someone threatens to do something to you or someone else if you don't do something in return. It's never okay and is against the law to blackmail somebody. It's also against the law to share sexual or nude images of young people under 18, even if both people were under 18 when the pictures were taken.

What your ex boyfriend is doing is not okay and is against the law. There are a few different options you have open to you, but they do mean talking to someone about it.

The first thing you could do is when your ex-boyfriend tells you what he is going to do, you can say what he is doing is illegal and tell him you are prepared to tell the police. Doing this may be enough and it might stop him from doing anything else. You should only do this if you feel comfortable talking to him.

You could actually talk to the police already if you wanted to do that. You don't need to wait until he threatens you again - what he is threatening to do is enough to tell the police about, but that would probably mean your parents or guardians finding out about it, so you would need to be comfortable with that.

Finally you could also talk to someone you trust - like your family - who may be able to help talk to people like the police for you if you don't feel you can do it yourself. And you can always talk to one of our counsellors if you need to. We're here to support you.

I hope this helps, thanks for your letter.


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