Ask Sam letter

Asker

To Sam

She touches me

Hi Sam

I am 8 and my mum is a childminder and she used to look after a 10 year old but doesnt any more because she moved away. Now I was five at the time and she was 10 and she used to get make me get into bed and she would put her hand down my pants. And touch my bits and make me kiss her. I don't know why I never told anyone but now I am eight I can I feel I can tell people . My mum and dad never believed me.

Ask Sam

Sam

Hi there,

It can feel very hard to talk about difficult things from the past. This is especially hard when saying them for the first time. Or if people don’t believe you when you do say it.

Asking for help is a real sign of strength. It can feel so difficult to talk about something so personal and upsetting. I imagine you may have felt very let down when your mum and dad didn’t believe you. But I want you to know that you’ve been really brave to speak out about what happened.

When someone touches you in private places on your body without you wanting them to, this is sexual abuse. And this is wrong. It can bring a lot of very confusing feelings and emotions, but it’s natural to feel like this.

It can be really difficult to tell somebody straight away, but what happened isn’t your fault and you did nothing wrong. Very often it can take time to think things throug. And think about who may be the right person to talk to.

If someone doesn’t believe you, it’s very important to not let this put you off telling somebody again, because you deserve to talk about what happened. If you keep it inside, then feelings can build up and it can get too much.

If you want to speak out about what happened to you, then we could help you prepare to do that. If you were to talk to one of our counsellors, they could help you to decide what to do next and how to do it. They could also talk about some of the difficult feelings and emotions that you have been holding on for what feels like a very long time.

You did the right thing writing this letter and I hope you are able to get the support you deserve.

Take care,
Sam

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