Hi sam
Could I have some help with my life because I'm scared of men when my little sis dad used to hit me and when a male person puts there hand out to give me a hand shake I say please don't hit me what should I do
Hi there,
It's never ok for someone to deliberately hurt or injure another person. Whats happened to you is very wrong. And its understandable that this has left you with some uneasy and nervous feelings, even after the abuse has stopped.
This is called physical abuse and its your right to report what happened so that this will never happen again. Its also really important to get support in coping with these feelings. You deserve to be happy and move forward from the difficult time youve been through.
What youve described to me is a very natural way to feel after what youve been through. Youve told me that you experience this when youre around men and it sounds like this brings up intense feelings and memories for you. When someone has been through a difficult experience it can cause lots of different reactions.
When you look at the people in your life, I wonder whether perhaps you can think of any adult males who you do have a close or good relationship with and feel they are supportive. Perhaps someone in your family, at school, or in your neighbourhood. It can take time for you to find that trust again, and it might be a good start to let others know what this is like for you.
It can be really scary asking an adult for help. But it can really help to talk through what youve been through and what its like for you to be around men now. Sometimes talking can be the first step towards getting support and coping better over time.
You dont have to cope alone. Our counsellors are always here to talk things through. You can call free on 0800 1111, log in for a 1-2-1 chat or send an email.
Take care for now,
Sam
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.
