Ask Sam letter

Asker

To Sam

Popularity

First of all, thank you for reading this message. This is something I've been wanting to get off my chest for a while now. Here's how the story goes. There is a boy at my school who is insanely popular. There's probably not a single person in the school who doesn't know who he is. The problem is, I think he's taking it for granted. I'm starting to get the impression that he feels as if he can get away with anything. And the truth is, he always does. He can do whatever he wants because he knows that he can get away with it. He's even gone to such lengths as to start spreading rumours and he has made my life at school very difficult. I have mentioned it a few times before, but every time, people think that it is just sour grapes. The truth is, me and him are polar opposites. He is always upbeat and bouncing off the walls while I'm more of a quiet person and I prefer to stick with the people I know. Me and him are almost like Sonic and Shadow. I'm seen as an "emo" by many because I sometimes come across as mysterious. There's nothing I can do about it though. I have tried to talk about it to teachers and they all just say I'm jealous. I don't know where I should go from here. Do I keep out of it and just accept that he will get away with it just because he's popular? Or do i keep trying to tell him or someone who won't just see it as sour grapes? I really don't know. Again, thanks for reading my letter and I hope to hear from you soon.
Ask Sam

Sam

Hi there,

Spreading unkind rumours about another person is bullying and not something anyone should have to put up with. Although someone might seem popular, that’s not an excuse for them to be a bully and you deserve to be taken seriously.
Sometimes when people don’t want to listen, showing them proof can help. If this person is saying something online then be sure to keep screenshots – and as difficult as it may be, keeping text messages or emails that show the bullying can help too.

If he’s not bullying you online then you could keep a diary of what happens. Making a diary can help in two ways – by giving you something to show people but also to help you cope with feelings. Writing things down, even if nobody else ever sees it, can be a good way of letting things out.

It also might be an idea to think about what you’d say to him now, if you had the chance. Writing a letter to him, as if he was going to see it can help you to work out all the things you really want to say. You don’t actually have to show him the letter, unless you felt like that would help.

You may know we have Message boards on bullying, where young people post messages about their own experiences. If you’d like, you could talk to a ChildLine counsellor. They are here to listen to you and support you.

Take care,
Sam

 

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