Ask Sam letter

Asker

To Sam

My friends

I am getting upset because of my friend, she keeps ejecting me from her and her friends. (She leaving Mr out all the time) I'm getting sick of it and we have Skype so me and her always fight. I have deleted her from my contacts but we are on groups together, she always is taking about me behind my back. She says thing she does and not me. Please, help me with this.
Ask Sam

Sam

Hi there,

Having friends can be really great, listening to each other, doing fun things together and supporting each other. But sometimes things can go wrong. And when they do, it can be a very difficult and upsetting time.

There are a lot of reasons why a friendship might go wrong or stop. Some things that might happen are having an argument, moving away, drifting apart because of different interests, being hurt by a friend and feeling like you can no longer be friends. 

Sometimes friends make up again but sometimes they don’t and it can be especially hard if one of the friends wants to get back into the friendship and the other one doesn’t. One way of trying to sort things out is to talk to each other about it and to find a way to make things better. If a friend doesn’t want to talk, maybe a teacher or another friend could speak to them and explain how you feel.

You explained in your message that your friend is talking about you behind your back and leaving you out of things. This sounds like bullying and it’s not okay for your friend to do this. You might like to check out the message boards to see how other people are coping in a similar situation.

You told me that your friend leaves you out from her group of friends. This makes me think that her friends may not really be your friends. It could be that you have other friends around who you could spend time with and build up a friendship group with. And be with people who value you for yourself and support you and care about you. Check out our tips for making new friends.

If you’d like to talk more about how things are for you, you could talk to a counsellor who would listen and support you.

Take care for now,
Sam

Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

Ask me a question

You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small.

Write me a letter