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Asker

To Sam

my friend is being bullied and i feel responsable

hey sam

im 13 years old and im really worried about my friend whos being bullied he has never really got along with loads of people and sometimes doesnt tell the truth but people think that ok for them to bully him.

i feel guilty because im normally there when it happens but i cant really do anything becausethey are 15-16 years old and even though im a girl i know they will hit me is well. I know all of them but i cant tell a teacher because my school is rubbish when it comes to bullying.

Sometimes they punch, kick and throw hot chocolate down him and one time another friend tried to help but he just got punched aroung the face and sent to recovery (told off) for most of the day for fighting.

i dont know how to help him its really distroying his self of steam.

im really worried

From CM

Ask Sam

Sam

Hi CM,

Thanks for your letter.

It sounds like you are really worried about your friend being bullied and you’ve done well to write a letter to me about it.

You have told me that your friend who is bullied sometimes doesn’t tell the truth and you’re right when you say that doesn’t make it okay for anyone to bully him. It could be really hard for you to see him being bullied and I want you to know it’s okay to get support by talking to someone you trust about this.

I can hear that you feel guilty about not being able to help your friend when the bullying happens - but it sounds like you are doing what you can to keep yourself safe. You have said that you can’t tell a teacher because your school are rubbish about bullying. Every school has an anti-bullying policy which explains what they will do if you tell them you are being bullied. It is their responsibility to protect pupils from being bullied. You can ask to see a copy of that policy at any time.

If talking to a teacher feels too difficult, perhaps you could think about talking to a family member or a trusted adult who may be able to contact the school for you. It would also be possible for an adult to contact the local education authority if they feel like school are not doing what they can to respond to bullying.

From what you have told me, it sounds like this bullying is having a big impact on your friend's self-confidence. It can be really difficult to know how to support someone who feels like that. You might find it useful to have a look at the bullying page in the Explore section which has lots of information and advice about bullying including ways to support a friend who is being bullied.

You could also let your friend know that ChildLine is here to support him too. Maybe you could have a look at the bullying pages together. You or your friend can talk to a ChildLine counsellor confidentially by phoning free on 0800 1111, logging in for a 1-2-1 chat or by sending an email to a counsellor from your locker. They are always there for you.

Take care,

Sam

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