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Foster Care

Dear Sam,

I have a friend that is in foster care and i'm really concerned with how she is coping. Before going into the care of someone out of blood relations, she stayed with my friend for a while but social services had told them they could not let her stay there becauase they had to look into the best intetrests of her (the only thing that was wrong was that the family had a child with problem).

My friend is now in private foster care and she hates it! Our school doesnt do much and her foster family have been the catalyst bettween the compleate split bettween her biological Father (they were getting back on track but now its truined because the foster family did not understand).

What can my friend or me do in this situation? She is not happy where she is and its causing her alot of problems with her mental health; she still has regular contact with my friends family and they are happy to take her in. The school aren't doing much and neither is Social Services, they don't ever listen to her- i'm concerned that my friend is going to run away if things aren't changed soon.

Please help me understand what we can do so she can get out of heer foster home.

Ask Sam


Hi there,

It can be really difficult when a friend is living in a place that seems to make them unhappy. Living in care can be very challenging for some people. If someone is not happy where they are living, it’s important that they talk to a person they trust about that. Living with a friend or someone else who is not family can sometimes be an option, although those decisions are made by social services. You might find it helpful to have a look at our page on living in care which explains who it can be useful to talk to.

Running away can be a very risky idea and it feels like it could be important to try and find a different ways to resolve things. Anyone who is struggling with their mental health can talk to a doctor or maybe a social worker about the support that might be available to them.

Supporting a friend who is feeling unhappy can be hard. It’s important to make sure you get some support for yourself if you need to. Perhaps you could think about some new things you could try with your friend as a way to take some time out together to see if that might help with coping.

Our page about asking an adult for help might help you to think about who can support you and your friend.

Take care,


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