Ask Sam letter

Hi there,

First of all, I want to tell you that when your brother beats you up this is physical abuse. No one has the right to hurt you in this way, and your parents are responsible for keeping you safe. 

You don’t mention if anybody knows about what’s happening, but maybe you could tell a trusted adult outside of the family such as a teacher, doctor or a social worker. All of these people have a duty to help you stay safe and to stop what is happening.

To do this, they may have to tell someone else, and so they may not be able to keep what you tell them private. Remember, if you’re not ready to take this step, you can talk to a ChildLine counsellor. There are a lot of things ChildLine can keep confidential that other adults can’t.

I can hear that you and your mum are no longer as close as you were, and that it upsets you when she scolds you and when you argue with each other. Family relationships can be difficult at times and talking about things can really help. Try telling your mum how you feel and that you miss how things used to be.

Perhaps you could tell your mum how much Taekwondo means to you. Exercise is a great way for young people to stay healthy and strong, both physically and mentally. If it feels too difficult to talk to your mum, you could talk to ChildLine any time and even practise with us what you want to say.

You say in your letter that you feel like leaving home. When things are difficult or unsafe at home, it’s understandable that you don’t want to be there. Your parents are responsible for you until you’re 16, when you can leave home without their permission. If you ever do feel like running away, it’s a good idea to talk to ChildLine or Shelter so you can explore your options and get some help and advice about how to keep safe.

Take care,
Sam