Ask Sam letter

Hi there,

I’m really glad you wrote to me about what’s happening at school. When someone calls you names, that’s called  bullying and it's always wrong. I know being called names can be upsetting and it can be very hard when the people who bully are older and bigger than you.

When people bully, they often want to make the other person feel bad. It can seem like they have lots of power. One thing I always tell young people is that people who bully aren’t really strong. After all, it’s kind of sad if the only way they can feel good is to hurt someone else’s feelings. 

Bullying has nothing to do with the truth. So when you’re being called names, one small idea is to remind yourself that the words they are saying are not true. It can also help to imagine you are wearing invisible armour (like what a knight would wear, but invisible)—and it’s so tough nothing can get past it. That means the next thing you can picture in your head is the bully’s words bouncing off your armour and falling to the ground, where they can’t hurt you. 

That is just one idea for how to deal with name calling during the school day, but it shouldn’t be happening at all. You may want to take a look at our message boards where other young people share their experiences of bullying and how they cope.

ChildLine often talk to young people about getting help and support from adults. Sometimes adults have to get involved to make the bullying stop. That might be the person who looks after you, a teacher or another adult you trust. There is nothing wrong with asking for help and letting adults know exactly who is bullying you. You have the right to feel safe. You can read more about asking an adult for help.

You’ve been very brave writing to me about this if you want to talk more, you can talk to one of our counsellors at any time.

Take care,
Sam