Ask Sam letter

Asker

To Sam

anoyed

I started smoking and now its got round to thr whole school theres one boy why keeps calling me a durty little smoker and hes bullied me before I even started also her got this mate and he keeps calling me names.
 
Theres also these girl who keep taking the mick out of me because initial are et also saying I dont wash

Teachers know I been bullied a lotin that school so they do keep any eye out on the girl they always ask if im ok I say I am

people say to me toignore them but I just csnt sometimes to I scream at the a swear telling them to stop
 
I just dont know what to fo no morbecause soon im going to end up hitting someone

Ask Sam

Sam

Hi there,

It is never okay for someone to bully you and it sounds like this is happening a lot. Whether you smoke or not, it isn’t acceptable for someone to pick on you. Ignoring people who treat you badly is a very hard thing to do. Whether you’re able to ignore them or not, what’s happening isn’t your fault.

It sounds like when teachers ask if you’re okay you sometimes say you are, even if you aren’t. This could mean you are dealing with things on your own. You deserve to have some support.

When you described your worry about being so angry that you could hit someone, I was reminded of a bottle of fizzy drink that is getting thrown around. Each time it is thrown around or isn’t handled gently, the gas inside builds up so that when the lid comes off, it sprays everywhere. I was imagining that like the bottle, each time you get treated badly, your anger builds up just like the gas in the bottle. When a bottle has been shaken, the safest thing to do is to open it gently in a safe place.

Is there anyone in your life who you feel safe around, who you could to open up to? Talking about your feelings in a safe way can really help. It might be that there’s someone at home or a teacher you trust. If not, it’s always okay to talk to a ChildLine counsellor. You can do this over the phone, in a 1-2-1 chat or via email. Whatever feels best for you.

You have also mentioned that you’ve started smoking. Sometimes smoking can be something some people do as a way of coping. The problem with using smoking as a way to cope is that it’s very bad for your health. If you’d like some support with this, you could check out our page about smoking. A ChildLine counsellor could support you with this too and perhaps help you to find safe ways to cope that don’t harm you.

Take care,
Sam

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