Thanks for your letter. You’ve done really well in explaining to me what’s been going on for you. I can hear that things have been so difficult for you at home that you’ve thought about running away. You’ve been really brave to share this with me.
I’m concerned to hear about the fights, particularly because you say your mum has been really hurting you. This is physical abuse, which is wrong and shouldn’t be happening to you. If you ever feel in danger then you can call 999. The emergency services are there to protect you.
I can hear that you’re upset and unhappy at home but it’s important you know that running away will not make it better. You will have different problems if you run away, such as thinking about where to stay, how you will eat, keep warm and keep yourself safe from being attacked by abusive and dangerous people. Our page on homelessness and running away has more information on the dangers of running away.
Everyone has a different relationship with other family members but your parents should be treating you and your sister and any other siblings equally. In every family it’s normal for there to be arguments sometimes, and these can be upsetting to deal with. However it’s not good for everyone's happiness and health if the arguments are happening all of the time. Sometimes it can be helpful to think about when the fights normally happen. For example, is it a certain time of day, week or month? And what normally happens before the fighting starts? This can help to see if there are any specific triggers which may be causing the fights. If there are, it can be easier for you to work out how those triggers can be avoided.
Speaking to a trusted adult about what’s going on at home could be one way to start making home life feel safe and happy. This could be a teacher at school or extended family. If you were to speak to a teacher they may tell social services in order for your family to get the support it needs to stop you from getting hurt. If you want to speak to ChildLine about this, in more detail you can call ChildLine by phone, logging in for a 1-2-1 chat or sending them an email.
Remember you deserve to be happy and safe.