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Topic No friends anymore... 

Question

To Sam 

21/09/2011 4:09pm 

No friends anymore... 

Last year I had a best friend and lots of friends and people liked me but now her old best friend has decided she wants to be friends with her again and they've both ditched me. I have no other friends at school and only one other friend out of school and now even she is ignoring me. But its not just that, this boy at school teases me and writes things about me and spreads rumors about me. He’s turning everyone at school against me and making them all hate me. I just really miss my best friend. When he teased me last year she was really supportive and kind but now she laughs and joins in. I cry so much all the time and I just can't tell anyone about it :( if I tell the school it'll just make everything ten times worse cause everyone will think I’m weird for saying I’m being bullied and think I’m lying and hate me even more. I can't tell my mum... she thinks I have lots of friends and love school and that everything’s fine, I just couldn't cope with the look on her face if I told her, she'd be so upset and angry and she'd go to the school and everyone would hate me, I’m crying as I write this and I’m starting to wonder if God thinks I just don't deserve friends cause I’ve been bullied in the past and my friends have ditched me in the past too. I’m always being left out and ignored and I just feel so lonely...
Sam's answer

Sam 

21/09/2011 4:12pm 

Hi there,

Thanks for writing to me.  It sounds like things are really tough for you at school and I can hear that you are feeling very upset about everything that is happening. 

What is happening is bullying and it is wrong.  No one has the right to make fun of some one, spread rumours about them or make them feel left out.  

It is your choice who you decide to talk to about what is happening and I think it is really brave of you to contact me.  Your school has a duty to protect you from bullying- all schools should have an anti-bullying policy, which is like a set of rules explaining what the school has to do if they find out someone is being bullied.  Perhaps you could talk to a teacher you like and ask to find out more about this.

I get the impression that you are worried people won’t believe that you are being bullied. I want you to know that ChildLine believes you and takes what you have written about seriously. How would you feel about keeping a diary of what is happening?  Just making a note of what happens and when, means that if you do decide to talk to a teacher or someone about what is happening, then you would have the diary as evidence. 

It sounds like it might be quite upsetting and lonely for you at the moment and I get the impression that it might be hard for you feeling that your mum thinks everything is OK at school. 

I want you to know that you do deserve to have friends and you should not be being bullied or left out. 

If you would like to talk more about what is happening, the counsellors at ChildLine would really like to support you.  You can contact them any time on 0800 1111 or online using the 1-2-1 chat (which works a bit like msn).  If you are interested in what other young people have to say about bullying you could have a look on the message boards. The message boards are a great place where young people can share their experiences and advice with one another. 

Take care.

Sam

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