Hello
I’m very sorry that this happened to you. No one is allowed to touch you in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable or upset. It sounds like it has been really tough carrying this with you for so long. People react very differently to these kinds of situations and it can be very natural that you would still feel very confused and affected by what happened. You did the right thing to send me a letter because it sounds like you are really struggling with this.
Have you thought about talking to your mum about what happened? It sounds like you could really use some support and there are people you can talk to about this. If you are not sure about talking to your mum then maybe you can think of another trusted adult who could give you some help and support? This could be another relative, a teacher, a school counsellor, a mentor or a youth worker for example. You shouldn’t have to go through this all by yourself. If you do find it difficult to decide who to talk to maybe you can talk with one of the ChildLine counsellors. ChildLine is here for you all day, every day. You can phone 0800 1111 or you sign up and talk with a counsellor online.
Take care and remember that it’s okay to need to talk about this. There is help out there for you and you don’t need to go through this all on your own.
Sam