Hi there,
Thanks for writing, it sounds like it really has been a confusing time for you and it’s brilliant that you are talking about this. I want you to know that children and young people of all different ages up to the age of 18 years old use the website and that there’s absolutely nothing wrong with you contacting me or ChildLine.
Young people begin to discover their sexuality at different ages, and it’s really important for you to remember that there’s nothing wrong with how you’re feeling right now. It’s understandable that you would be feeling confused at a time like this, and it’s important that you remember that there’s no right or wrong answer to what your sexuality is.
It sounds like you’ve been feeling quite isolated with your feelings and you have been scared of what might happen if you spoke to your friends. I can imagine it being difficult not being able to talk about it properly.
Whether you decide you want to come out as being bisexual is always your choice. The first step to coming out is being able to tell yourself that you are lesbian, gay or bisexual. The next step is to tell someone else. There’s some really good information on coming out and sexuality on the ChildLine page on Sexual orientation. As well as that there are loads of LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender) young people who use the Sexuality message board, it can be a really good place to talk about how you’re feeling openly in an environment with other young people who are going through similar things to you.
I want you to know that homophobia is something that’s never acceptable, whether it’s at school or anywhere else. If you ever feel like you’re being bullied at school because of your sexuality, you have the right to work towards making it stop. Sometimes the thought of someone saying or doing something about your sexuality can be really scary, it can really help to think about what you might do if anything like this was to happen, like if there are any particular teachers you might feel comfortable talking to and what you might want to say to them.
It might really help you to talk about how you have been feeling to a ChildLine counsellor. They’re there to talk to you in a nonjudgemental way about anything that might be happening, and can give you someone independent to talk about how you have been feeling and maybe about what you might like to do with your friends. You can contact them by email, online on the 1-2-1 chat (which is like MSN) or on the phone on 0800 1111 (it’s completely free and won’t show up on the phone bill).
Another organisation that might be good for you to contact is PACE (0808 180 7223). They can offer support to anyone living in the UK dealing with issues relating to being LGBT.
Take care,
Sam