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Topic My friends... 

Question

To Sam 

24/01/2011 8:56pm 

My friends... 

Hi Sam,

My friend (who is a girl) recently told me that another one of my friends (a boy) who is three years older than her was asking for pictures of her naked.

Hearing this I asked her had he stopped and she said "Yes", so now I had forgotten about the subject until yesterday when the boy who asked that before, was on my phone checking his facebook, then he closed the app then gave me back my phone.

A few hours afterwards I tried to check my facebook but not realising he hadn't logged out I checked my messages seen there was one from the girl and started reading... I saw he was still asking for pictures as well as other things.

Can you please give me some advice on what to do now?

Sam's answer

Sam 

 02/02/2011 3:55pm 

Hi there

Thanks for your letter. It sounds as though you are worried about this and you took a positive step in asking for advice on what to do next. You are right to be concerned about your friend asking for naked pictures, as well as other things. 

Sending a sexual photo of yourself or someone else via text is sometimes called ‘Sexting.’ According to CEOP (Child Exploitation and Online Protection Centre), if both people involved in sexting are under 18, this is illegal (even if the person is your boyfriend or girlfriend) and if one of the people is over 18, they are committing an illegal act against a child. It is against the law as whoever has that picture on their phone, is technically in possession of an indecent image of a child. This information is available at a website called Think u know. You may find the site useful for advice on how to stay safe and how to report your concerns. You might want to speak to your friends individually and tell them about the site so they can look around it themselves. 

You don’t mention how old your friend is in your letter, but that the boy asking for photos is 3 years older than her. It is important to remember that any sexual activity with someone under the age of 16 is also illegal and that your friend is aware of the consequences of sending pictures of herself. Once you send a picture to someone, you lose control over what happens to that picture. That means if it is uploaded onto the internet, it is potentially there for anyone to see. It could also be sent around to other people in school on their phones. No one should feel pressurised to do anything they don’t feel comfortable with, as everyone has the right to say no and feel safe from harm. 

You and your friends are also welcome to discuss this further with a ChildLine counsellor online or by calling 0800 1111 for further help and advice.

Take care and I hope you found my advice helpful,

Sam

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