Hi there
Thank you for deciding to get in touch. I think the way you are feeling sounds very understandable and not stupid at all! Has anything has been said or done that makes you feel that you were a mistake? It sounds as though you might be keeping these feelings to yourself, to talk more about your worries without being judged you could speak to a ChildLine counsellor either online in a 1-2-1 chat, or by phone on 0800 1111. You could also have a look at the Home and family relationships message board to find out how other young people have coped with their experiences, or you could write your own message there.
It’s good to hear you feel your dad is great, but it sounds as though he says some things to you that you find hurtful. It also seems like you would like to be treated in a more adult way as you get older. You explained all these feelings to me very clearly and also gave me good examples of how you’d like things to change, like needing your own space and have your own responsibilities. Maybe you could think about saying similar things to your dad. Pointing out the responsibilities that you already have could be a way of showing him how mature you are. If you think talking to him directly about it could be difficult you could try writing something down to give to your dad to read.
From what you said about exam results it sounds as though your dad is putting a lot of pressure on you to do well. Pressure to do well in exams is something that causes lots of young people stress. There is more information and advice about this in the School and College pages on the Explore part of the ChildLine website. As you are already starting to feel this pressure, now could be a good time to think about the best ways to prepare for your exams, and ways to cope when it is time to take the exams. Have a think about whether there are any members of staff at your school that you would be comfortable talking to about this.
You could also get in touch with ChildLine counsellors to talk more about it. Another way of doing this is by signing up for an online 1-2-1 chat or sending an email, and you will get a personal reply from a counsellor.
I’m really glad you wrote to me, please remember you can speak to ChildLine again at any time.
Take care
Sam