Violent, alcoholic, drug addict of a father

To Sam 30/03/2011 10:31pm	Violent, alcoholic, drug addict of a father The subject says it. That was my dad for you, and it hurts to admit it, but it is true, i am 12, and growing up with a dad like that does affect you i guess. my dad and mum are now finally seperated, after my mum dealt with it for 22 years of marriage. Only two years ago did my dad go to Rehab, in south africa, and I miss him. I haven't seen him properly since then. Only really spoken on the phone, etc etc. Although he hurt me, alot, mentally AND PHYSICALLY. i stil love him, and i am the youngest in my family, with a 15 year old brother, and 2 21 year old sisters, yet they all got/get counselling, yet i don't, and i was closest to my dad, why is this? I have such mixed emotions, because i miss him, yet i shouldn't, i get told everyday i should be greatful he is out of my life -- should I?
Sam 05/04/2011 8:06am	Hi there Thanks for your letter. It sounds as though you've had a lot to deal with whilst growing up and that things have been difficult, and still are difficult. It's clear that you are missing your Dad but are also feeling mixed emotions due to your Dad’s behaviour towards you in the past. It is OK to feel this way. You can still love your Dad, and at the same time feel unsure and have mixed emotions because you don't like his behaviour. You say he hurt you mentally and physically, both of which can be very difficult to deal with. It sounds like you feel counselling might be helpful for you. If you would like to talk to a counsellor at ChildLine you can do this by calling on: 0800 11 11, for free, or sign up and have a 1-2-1 chat online or send an email. ChildLine is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. It sounds as though people are telling you how you should be feeling; you have the right to feel how you feel. If you did speak to a ChildLine counsellor they would support you by helping you to explore your feelings and find a way forward that feels right for you. Take Care Sam

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