Hi
I’m really pleased you have written to me about getting angry. Anger is a common emotion and is actually part of our in-built self defence system that helps us to keep safe when we might be in danger. However, anger can also be unhelpful when it is triggered by something that is not really dangerous. Also, when this type of emotion is constantly around, it can sometimes feel like you are not in control of it.
Many people who experience strong angry behaviour can be helped, and there are two main areas to begin to look at. The first one is to identify what might be causing the anger in the first place, and looking at dealing with that, for example helping someone feel more safe, or in control, or more confident, or dealing with unresolved trauma. The second area is to look at helping to change the angry behaviour by exploring strategies for dealing with stressful situations, or teaching new skills such as how to be assertive without getting angry.
It sounds like you are beginning to feel quite desperate for this to end, so I would like to encourage you to contact ChildLine and talk to a counsellor about what has been happening. ChildLine counsellors will not judge or criticise you for getting angry, but they will help you find a way of feeling less angry. You can call ChildLine on 0800 1111, go online for a 1-2-1 chat or email us.
Take care
Sam