Hi there
Thanks for writing to me and telling me how things are with your family. It feels as though you are having a tough time coping with how your brother is acting at the moment and you are becoming very frustrated with how your parents are letting him get away with making everybody’s life difficult.
You mention that your brother hits you and you are told not to wind him up. At ChildLine we believe it is wrong to hit anyone and what your brother is doing to you is wrong and he should be stopped. Your parents asking you to stop winding him up is not helpful. Your Mum may find it useful to contact ‘ParentLine’ on 0808 800 2222. They can offer advice for your Mum on how to speak to your brother about the way he is acting.
I can feel how frustrated you are with the impact your brother is having on your homework. Your homework is important, it is important that you have a place you can work and think in peace. As it causing a strain on your school life you could speak to your teacher and tell them what is happening. Ask them to speak to your parents about providing a quiet and private place for you to work without interruption.
You have said you believe your Mum loves your brother more than your sister and you. Some parents find it much easier to cope with young children than young adults. This can sometimes feel like they love the younger children more but in many cases it is that they are just more confident in how to deal with them. You say that your younger brother doesn’t pack his schoolbag or iron his clothes; could this be that your Mum is trying to keep him as a child for as long as she can because she feels more comfortable with treating him like a child and your brother has learned how to take advantage of this?
I can feel how frustrated you are with how he is making your life difficult; you say, ‘I am literally going to explode.’ It feels as though this is very upsetting for you and your parents are not hearing you. You say that your sister has also experienced this and has found a way to deal with it by going to your Granny’s. Have you talked to your sister about how she deals with it? You could speak to a ChildLine counsellor about what is happening and ChildLine will listen and support you. There are a number of ways to contact ChildLine – you could phone for free on 0800 1111 or you sign up for a ChildLine account and have a 1-2-1 chat or send an email.
You may also find information in Explore on family relationships.
Take care,
Sam